"'I will no longer fear what the Lord may call me to because I know His love for me and I trust His grace is great enough to carry me through."
I have not written in a long while because I have not had anything to say. I thought it better to keep my mouth shut. So now I will do my best to write what I so desire to share.
Yesterday during my devotions the Lord brought this verse before me. Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. Heb 12:1
I prayed the Lord would open my eyes to the wights in my life. I knew there were some because my heart was not in complete unity with the Lord however, I could not pin point what they were.
I continued my day by going to a wonderful church service. The Lord convicted me of many things and continued to try my heart. But there was still something I was missing. I then received a bunch of notes from my Ellerslie sisters. When it got handed to me I strangly could not hold back my tears. "Maybe I got to little of sleep" I thought to myself while I searched for the reason of my emotions. I soon realized it was because of the love I felt by all of them and ultimately by my God that tears where flowing. I thought of my favorite quote by Corrie Ten Boom "Nothing is too great for Gods power and nothing is too small for His love!" My week had been very trying and was tired and worn down by that Sunday morning. The Lord was softening my heart and opening my eyes. Yet He was not done with me. That evening I went to listen to the Rosen family speak about their trip to Mexico. There I saw the need of so many people and the sacrifice it took to meet their needs. Instead of being full of compassion and desire to spread Gods love I was tempted by my comfort and pleasure and looked at the cost of such a life. God in his faithfulness opened my dim eyes and I began to see what I was missing. I began to find what was wrong. I began to realize that I had fear of giving some things up. I had made things to complicated and looked only to my ability. I had left faith in the gutter. I began to see Gods grace in ever situation. The fear of the future dimed and the power of God was made clear. The Lord pin pointed it for me. He showed me I had no need to fear what He may call me to because His love for me and His grace that enables me is more then enough! Later that evening I expressed my concern about a situation to my brother Philip. He said with joy on his face "Don't you believe the spirit will lead you?". Well of course I though to myself :) He continued to remind me of the time Paul was extorting the Romans saying he feared lest they lose the simplicity of Christ. Now I could see now I had it. It was not about what I had to give up NO it was about simply trusting and believing in my Gods great Grace and love! He is always enough just believe Him!